I'm using my son's blog to vent tonight. It's been an emotional day. If you know me well, you know that one of my weekly highlights is going to my step aerobics class at Bally's on Tuesday and Thursday nights. It's the one thing that hasn't changed since I had Jackson. I go alone (since obviously the childcare is inadequate) and for one hour I don't think about anything but moving my feet on and off a step. Although sometimes I pray for the people in my class who aren't very good and ask God to help them get it. And when I think I'm really good, I pray for humility so God doesn't let me eat it in front of everyone. My instructors are Jeanne (Tuesday nights) and Jon (Thursday nights). They're amazing. Jeanne is really cool and fit, and her class is stinking hard. Jon's class is not as hard, but it's really enjoyable. I haven't been to class since that fateful day when Jackson had a fit in childcare and I was summoned out. So tonight I hauled my happy bee-hind over to Bally's and what do you know...there's no instructor. 20 minutes later a sub showed up. Come to find out, Jeanne is LEAVING us and we're getting someone new. Supposedly it's one of our class members. What?!?! I seriously got a lump in my throat and I pouted like a 3 year old for the next 30 minutes. I would've left, except I didn't want to be rude to the poor sub who happened to be there when they broke the news. I'm racking my brain trying to think of someone Jeanne-like in our class. Nope, no one. I imagined myself complaining, I mean addressing my concern, to the manager. But I honestly thought I would start crying. Can you imagine the laughs the whole staff would get out of that? Maybe I should have done it just to make their day.
Jackson is seven months old now. I should be posting the amazing new pictures we had taken of him and writing something wonderful about my little angel. I think I'm avoiding it because we are now over half-way to one year. I'm really in denial. It's going so fast. I promise I'll do a proper seven month update when I'm done grieving about Jeanne and about my baby getting so big.
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