Blooper Reel

Clip 1:
On Thursday morning, Melissa and I had to go to Hobby Lobby to pick up some small metal stands to hold the table number cards for the reception. Picture something that holds a frame or a plate upright. We needed about 20 of them but we could only find a few. We realized that there were plenty of stands throughout the store, but we had to remove them from the back of merchandise that had been artfully and strategically displayed. Pretty much, a lot of display cases looked like they had been rummaged through by three-year-olds by the time we left.

Un-numbered Clip (because I forgot this one and had to add it in):
Ten minutes before we were supposed to leave for the rehearsal dinner, I heard my sister scream, "Mom! Get up here!" from her bedroom. Melissa had just put on her beautiful, black and white satin, strapless dress and realized the store had forgotten to remove the sensor. Ahhhh! And it was one of those ink-release sensors. Can you believe it? Curt and Dad sent up some urgent prayers and headed out to the garage with my sister's expensive cocktail dress. We had another dress on standby, but this one was so beautiful! Dad and Curtis managed to saw the two pieces of the sensor in half without firing the ink all over the fabric. Whew! That was a close one!

Clip 2:
As I mentioned, I made the ultimate Girls Night Out CD for the weekend. "At Last" by Etta James was the first song on it. We played the CD all weekend and I felt a certain measure of pride and self-congratulations every time I popped the CD in and heard that song. It's so romantic and weddingy. Well, when I decided to play the CD in the bride's room after exhausting all our other options (we were there for hours), Melissa enlightened me to the fact that she absolutely hates that song. Hates it, hates it, hates it. Apparently when she saw the first round of her bridal portraits, which were a complete disaster due to circumstances that no one could control, that song was playing. Alrighty then! Good one, Mand! There's no telling how many times I made her listen to it. The good news is, the Father of the Bride sponsored a do-over portrait session and it turned out to be gorgeous.

Clip 3:
I was having some issues with my dress inching down below my support devices. Liz so kindly offered to share her fabric tape with me. So we taped that dress right on to my skin to keep it in place. However, the weight of the dress eventually pulled it down enough to reveal a weird looking warp in my skin that was actually the clear tape. I was having none of that. I summoned the M-O-B and she dutifully removed it from where we had attached it to my back. Have you ever had your back waxed? I'm guessing not. Me neither, thankfully. However, I now know what it feels like...and it's horrible! Horrible!

Clip 4:
Not long before the ceremony was to begin, Curtis called me with some grave news. Jackson had decided that my sister's wedding day would be a great day not to take a nap. The day I would need him to be as happy, patient, and flexible as possible. The day I would hope he wouldn't turn into a pumpkin at 8:00. Sigh. It wasn't for lack of opportunity. What happened was Jackson also decided my sister's wedding day would be a great time to try climbing out of his crib for the first time. (He has a real crib at my parents' house.) Curt walked into the room to try to motivate him to fall asleep when he saw Jackson doing a bridge between the crib rail and the foot of the bed that is probably 20 inches away from the crib. His toes were the only thing hanging on to the crib. Little stinker! Curt said he was rather proud of him but he wouldn't let himself show it. Jackson did fall asleep on the way to the church, so at least he got 50 minutes of rest.

Clip 5:
As you can imagine, I was very anxious to see my son in his little suit. Curt brought Jackson, Cozy and Lindsay up to the bride's room so that I could see him. As soon as the doors flung open he saw his mommy standing there with a big hairdo, a lot of makeup, and a long teal dress; some woman wearing a white gown and some kind of gauze on her head; five other girls in long teal dresses; and his grandma in plain clothes with big fancy hair and no makeup. As soon as the awwwwww's started, he burst into tears and had a meltdown. It was just all too much. Bless his heart. I should have known. He absolutely hates being brought into a crowd of people and cries every time.

Clip 6:
The only way we could keep Jackson happy enough for the photographer to snap a few pictures was to let him hold the cars he had been playing with all weekend. So those will show up in the formal shots. I ask you, who would dare take cars away from a two-year-old and then ask him to smile? A fool! That's who!

Clip 7:
Well, my dad's bow tie was too tight, he hated his cummerbund, and he was really nervous about the big dance. So what did he do? Before we left the church he took off the bow tie and cummerbund and changed into his Wranglers and boots. Only my dad.

Clip 8:
I wish you could tell from the images provided how many times and how badly I got in trouble with my sister for taking pictures. I clung to the hope that she would thank me later.

Clip 9:
Cozy, Lindsay, and Jackson were seated at a table with our dear friends the Bridgwaters. The trio had to leave after dinner because Jackson was out of steam. Later I walked over to the table and sat down where Jackson had been sitting so I could visit with Kay and Jerrell. I immediately noticed a sick-looking piece of food sitting on the tablecloth. I thought it was the lump of lobster from the lobster bisque. I knew my in-laws weren't big seafood fans, but surely... (Teasing you, Cozy! Love you!) It was then that I was told that my son had chewed up a roll and kept it in the roof of his mouth. At the opportune time, he put his finger in his mouth and flicked the chewed up roll across the table. It was a proud moment for Mommy.

Clip 10:
After all was said and done, Curtis and I headed home to my parents' house. It was not a short drive and it had been raining. When we were just 2 minutes away, I got a call from my mom saying that Colin had lost his wallet and that she and I were going to have to go back to the church and the reception sight and look until we found it. Are. You. Kidding. Me? We both wanted to start crying because we were so tired. Thank You and praise You, Lord Jesus, because Melissa's blessed wedding planner found it at the church and took it to their hotel. Big, big sigh of relief!


Hmmm, I'm thinking I might need a nap now!