Thursday, June 21, 2007
Y'all, I'm having some major intestinal issues. Montezuma hates me. He wants to avenge me until I waste away into a size 2. Which would be nice except for all the cramping. And the fact that I could not leave my house at all today. If I had been more than 30 seconds away from (let's be as refined as possible) the W.C., it would have meant trouble. You know, Monty, can I call you Monty? I have things to do tomorrow. And I am not about to go buy some Depends because I'm afraid of your sudden pranks. Buying a pregnancy test two days ago was embarrassing enough. It was probably you behind the "Look! She hasn't paid! She's shoplifting a pregnancy test!" alarm that falsely sounded as I attempted to exit the drugstore. Really funny, Monty. Really funny.