Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Anglican Summer

Tomorrow we are heading off to Middle School Camp Houston, which will be held somewhere around Livingston, TX. Curt is the camp speaker and I am the camp speaker's son's chaperone. Since this camp is for our old church, we will get to be with some dear friends for five days. It should be really fun.

I just went to Target and spent way too much money on everything we needed for camp. I got my spf 50 sunblock, the obligatory camp one piece swimsuit, and a flotation device for The Mister. I was severely tempted by those gradual self tanning lotions by Jergens and Oil of Olay. However, I'm bringing pale back and if I really believe I'm enough without a tan, I have to stay true to my conviction! Plus, Curt was with me and those lotions were $6 as opposed to $3.

Please allow me to share one of my tanning mishaps with you all. Three years ago Curt and I spent five months serving at a church in northeast England. Half way through our time there I was going to fly home and be in my dear college roommate Mel's wedding. When May rolled around, I started getting very anxious about getting a tan. Something about the very real pale-blueness of the majority of people in England frightened me. I was terrified of facing my friends without some brown in my skin. Now in this part of England the summer highs only reached into the 70s. So on a particularly warm and cloudless day in May, I took the opportunity to soak up the rays.

We were living in a vicarage (parsonage) inside an Anglican church. It was just a little flat above the church offices. We had a nice courtyard outside our front door that had a four foot brick wall around it. So I took some blankets and my laptop down into the courtyard to do my work. I was not idiotic enough to wear my bathing suit, but I did wear some athletic shorts and a spaghetti strap tank top. There I was typing away, doing my work, soaking up the sun, minding my own business, when I started hearing some quiet voices. Well, that must just be some people walking by. I bet they didn't even notice me. Fifteen minutes pass. More voices. Hmmmmm. What is going on? It was the middle of a weekday and nothing should have been going on at the church. I stood up - a stupid American girl with pieces of grass stuck to her skin, ponytail awry, big sunglasses on, not wearing a whole lot, pretty much looking homeless. And what did I see on the other side of the wall but a group of about thirty adults in dark suits and dresses waiting to enter the church. Oh wait, it gets better. Then I turned to my side and directly on the other side of the wall, not five steps away from me, was a black hearse.

How long? How long, O Lord, had those people been standing there? Had that hearse been parked there? How loud had poor Aunt Penny screamed when they opened the casket and saw the body of that poor soul in mid roll from idiot girl sunbathing in the church courtyard in front of all the funeral guests?

*Edited to add: Wouldn't you know, for about a minute I accidentally posted this on my other blog, thinking it was THIS blog. I nearly died! It will probably still show up on some people's bloglines or whatever they use. Well, they'll know more about me than they wanted to!

30 comments:

WillBlog said...

Too funny! What we won't do for some tan!

CrownLaidDown said...

Funny! The MRI went well...will know in 48 hours they said...thanks for your prayers...mine are coming for both the director and the director's sons' chaperone and said son :)
Love
Holly

RealEstateGirl said...

Oh my, Amanda, that's one of those stories that you are horrified, but certainly laugh about later!

Alana said...

Oh my! We lived in England for a year when my husband was in Grad school so I can TOTALLY picture this in my head!

He was in art school and his studio was actually in a deconsecrated Anglican church.

We lived in this little village and there were no other Americans nearby. I could tell you a story or two. Good memories!

Marc and Charity said...

Well this sounds very familiar! Our first 3 years here, in south Wales, we lived in a flat above the church we worked with! How funny. We were surrounded by a graveyard though. And it rains too much here to even think about laying out. Thanks for the laugh this morning! I'm glad to know someone else has experienced living above a church.

Susan said...

You are just the sweetest thing...I laughed so hard. I completely imagined the looks on their faces. We are such slaves to good color, aren't we?

Have a great time at camp. Will keep y'all in my prayers.

Sue said...

That is a great story!!! So funny. I'm glad it was you and not me :)

How can you not spend too much at Target- that store is dangerous!

Have a great time at camp.

Jamie said...

Hilraious story!

I also konw about spending WAY TOO much money at Target before camp season. It seems as though you need EVERYTHING for that week. Things that you don't normally need at home, you just might need at camp!!!

Have fun!

Kelly said...

Although, can you imagine how much the embarrassment quotient would have been upped had you been wearing a bikini?!?

Have fun at camp!

Shelly said...

LOL. Big sun glasses and ponytail gone awry - doesn't it always end up that way!?

Thank you for taking care of this moment, b/c it sounds like something that would end up happening to me! :)

Have a blast these next 5 days!

Mindy said...

TOO funny!
Living in a parsonage can have it's challenges....next door to the church is close enough -- I cannot imagine being IN the church....
I would love to convince hubby that doing a pastorate in England for a while IS in the best interest of our family. =) That is awesome!

jen said...

Oh no! I groaned just reading this. That is something I would have done too girl, don't feel bad. :) I gave up on summer tans a long time ago. Of course mother says that a little yard work will get you tanner than any bed or lotion. :) Have fun at camp this week!

annie said...

That is a funny story. I posted a funny story about being embarrassed yesterday, somehow reading yours helps ease my pain a little :o).

Karen said...

Have a great trip and I will be praying for you all and for Jackson - I am sure he will have a great time! Camp is awesome!
Oh. My. Sweet. Mercy. I love "I just wanted to die" stories...no pun intended. :)

Myrna said...

Amanda Girl,
You are so funny! I had to read this one to Mr.L. He appreciates a Moore Woman story now and then!:)

kittyhox said...

Very embarassing. You are a girl after my own heart. What did you do? Did you just run inside and hide?

Have a wonderful time at camp!

The Preacher's Wife said...

Oh I love it!!

Just to make you feel better - I flashed the little old men at an assisted living next door to my house..The story is way too long to post, but let's just say their eyesight is keener than I ever gave them credit for being 90 years old and all...:))

Hope you have a great time at camp!!

:)

Debra said...

I just love reading your posts.

I am still a lover of camp. You will have great fun with old friends and your little mister.

I cannot top your tanning story. Yes...Go pale...by all means...go pale.

connorcolesmom said...

Oh I laughed out loud and got a very funny look from my 2 boys who asked what I was reading!!

Seriously, what we do for that sun kissed glow - hehe !!
Got to love it!!

Jackson is going to have a blast at camp and I will keep you and the family in my prayers!!
God bless,
Kim

Sunni at The Flying Mum said...

that's funny b/c I spent way too much on sunscreen at Target just the other day. I even got some cooling spray SPF 50 for myself. We really are bringing pale back.

Jackie said...

i have been shopping for camp for 2 months now (and it's still a month away) OH- the horror that I migth forget something!!

I am rolling laughing at the tanning story..texas girls and their tans (and big hair).. you are too cute!!

have a great time at camp... hopefully jackson will have a great camp experience too!!

Michelle said...

Love It!

jennyhope said...

Amanda! I am praying for you guys! I have to tell you to how the blog is bearing fruit! I have met fellow sisters and they have brought others to Bible study! God is SO AWESOME it is not even FUNNY!!
love jenny
I am going on 3 weeks of stomach bug! I hope you are done with it! My fam keeps picking something up! Craziness!

jennyhope said...

This is absolutely hilarious! I would have had to get in the casket with Aunt Penny!

Jungle Mom said...

OT; Thanks fr your prayers these last days have been hard here in Venezuela. we are back from a safe "retreat" and things are still a bit topsy turvy here.

Blessed Assurances said...

That's funny! A Texas girl through and through! :) I would do the same thing.

BTW-I will be at your Mom's thing on Friday and Saturday at Life Today. Sorry you will not be there but enjoy your time with the youth. I used to be an intern at a church and summers were fun but hectic b/c I was NEVER in one place more than 7 days.

Little Birdies Mommie said...

I too am bringing white back in! Next time you're in a pool, take a good look at your glowing whiteness!

Amy T said...

I thought the added comment about posting it on the wrong blog almost as funny as the story itself. Don't worry, we (all your Sistas) love you on that blog too. :)

The Bergers said...

As soon as you started, I knew where you were going with it! I remember you telling me about that - for I think we went shopping in York soon after! Ah...those were the good ol' days...but these days are even better!

julie said...

Thanks for the laugh!!!