It's here folks. The milestone you've all been waiting for. As of last week I fit acceptably back into my favorite pair of pants. I know, it's pretty big news. I bought these pants at Banana Republic when they were doing kind of a Naval theme in spring of 2005. They're white with black pin stripes, very long, and have large cuffs at the bottom. Which, incidentally, caused me to fall down the stairs one night when I stepped a skinny heel into one of them. That was fun. But seriously, these pants were so great that when my sister saw them, she immediately went out and bought a pair of her own. That's how I know when I've achieved shopping greatness. And also when my dad hates my shoes.
These were my go-to pants whenever I wanted to look good or feel professional. So you can imagine how eager I was to see them and wear them after Jackson was born. Something about being covered in poop, pee, spit up, and milk makes you crave even one hour of being clean and polished in your nice clothes. Which can be nicely accomplished (with a lot of work) on a Sunday morning.
It was perfect timing! By Easter I would be back in my normal size and I could wear them for several months. Right? But, sadly, when I mustered the courage and stepped into them I realized that something about the waist of the pants was very, very unforgiving. It's not that I couldn't button them, but I just wasn't doing them justice. I hope you can relate. And then I remembered that in the early weeks or months of pregnancy, these were the first pair of pants that caused me to look upon myself in disgust. I vowed not to attempt to wear them again this side of labor. That was a depressing moment - when my go-to pants did not perform.
Now perhaps I have adequately conveyed why this is such a special occasion. So tonight I'd like to thank Jamie, my aerobics instructor who has truly gained my respect, and Lean Cuisine for making this extraordinary moment possible. I just want you to know that I tried on the pants again tonight to make sure that all the birthday cake didn't disqualify me from writing this post. And we're still in business.